It is against the law to attack anyone physically.  You also have the right to bring anyone who attacks you into court.  However, it is perfectly legal to engage in mutual combat.  Neither of you is breaking the law and neither of you is liable.

I highly recommend that the next time someone threatens you with violence, you take the high road.  That does not mean that you turn the other cheek or walk away.  It means that you should challenge that individual to mutual combat.  In other words, you should say to them, “Let’s take this outside, asshole.  We’ll settle this like men.”  Do not be confused by the language here.  Females can do this too!

Do not stand idly by while thugs and cowards threaten you, your freedom, or your way of life.  If they really hate you and if they really want to see you suffer, give them that opportunity on a silver platter!  Make the bold offer to go into the parking lot and settle up, one-on-one, mano e mano.  It is perfectly legal and you cannot lose.

Are you confused at the idea that you cannot lose?  What if they are bigger than you?  What if they are clearly stronger than you?

You are not seeing the whole picture.  There are so many avenues for success in this scenario that go well beyond the fight itself.  In most cases, physical combat between two people who hate each other results in a sense of mutual respect that did not exist before you took a punch in the face.  Even if they beat you in physical combat, you will still land a few good punches.  That will hurt!  No one wants to be in a situation where they can be hurt.  Knowing that you are capable of hurting them will make them respect you more.  More importantly, knowing that you are willing to hurt them, even if it means putting yourself in a tough spot, will make them respect you.

There is more to this.  Most cowards who threaten violence at the drop of a hat are not willing to go through with it.  This is something that kids used to learn on the playground when bullies came around.  Bullies are looking for easy targets.  Kids who are willing to fight back, even if they lose, are anything but easy targets.  Fighters always win, mostly because they are willing to step up and most bullies are not willing to risk that much.  It is highly likely that your opponent will back down the moment you illustrate your willingness to take them to the next level.  And what have you done wrong by offering to give them what they want?  If they are into the idea of punching you, then offer them the risk-free opportunity to get it.  Two opponents in mutual combat is not wrong, even in the eyes of the law.

The benefits of a fight just keep on going, especially if you make it public.  You can go into the parking lot alone, or you can go at it in a crowd.  Prove yourself to all your friends if that is what you think you need to do.  I highly recommend a moderator to look after the rules.  Make this a gentlemen’s duel.  No kicking when the other is down.  The fight continues as long as you are both on your feet.  You fight until someone cries uncle or until someone cannot get up.  Fight to the end!  Fight to win!  Fight for whatever it is you think you need to be fighting for.  Win or lose, you stood up for yourself!  Not only will your opponent be forced to respect you, but so will your friends – and his friends too.  I can also guarantee you that whatever it was that led you to believe that you needed to swing bare knuckles for will suddenly not feel so important.  You will choose your words more carefully next time.  So will your opponent!

There is more!  Those who observe this combat will either be inspired or rehabilitated.  They may be inspired to stand up for themselves.  One-on-one.  Get it over with!  Challenge that asshole to stand and fight or shut the fuck up!  Or they will see the light and realize the error of their ways.  They will either reconcile themselves to those people they have been antagonizing or they will simply shut the fuck up and go away.  Either way, the end result is perfect.  The violent talk is over.  The tough talk will end and the dedicated will pony up and the bullies will disappear.  Real men and women will win the day, respect among peers will be reinstated, and we can all go back to the world as it should be.  And if all this fails to occur, then you can guarantee there will be at least one great benefit to the community – they will love it!  Everybody loves a good fight!

Do not talk tough unless you really mean it.  And if you do really mean it, be the first person to offer the opportunity to make it real.  No cops.  No lawyers.  One-on-one.  Mano e mano.  No weapons.  No outside help.  No kicking or punching when someone goes down.  You fight until someone gives in or cannot stand.  Gentlemens’ rules and you fight until it is over.  Bring a moderator if you need one.  Set a time and a place.  Do the whole community a favor and let them in on the plan.  Everybody wins, no matter who wins!

Come at me, bro.  Let’s settle this like men.

-Sisyphus

This is a continuation of an earlier article.  If you want to see the whole series, go back to the first article and you will find links to every part that came afterward.

Religion is essentially the study of human nature and morality.

Religion will teach you that your best option for illustrating your ability to be good is found in your willingness to serve others.  The humility that comes from selfless service is an indispensable character trait.  Without it, you can never be happy.  Also, your only option for serving God is found in serving others.

“Then the King will say to those on his right, ‘Come, you who are blessed by my Father, inherit the Kingdom prepared for you from the creation of the world. For I was hungry, and you fed me. I was thirsty, and you gave me a drink. I was a stranger, and you invited me into your home. I was naked, and you gave me clothing. I was sick, and you cared for me. I was in prison, and you visited me.’

“Then these righteous ones will reply, ‘Lord, when did we ever see you hungry and feed you? Or thirsty and give you something to drink? Or a stranger and show you hospitality? Or naked and give you clothing? When did we ever see you sick or in prison and visit you?’

“And the King will say, ‘I tell you the truth, when you did it to one of the least of these my brothers and sisters, you were doing it to me!’”

– Matthew 25:34-40

Selfless service becomes much easier with gratitude.  You will be more likely to engage in service towards others when you realize what great service has been done for you, your own intrinsic value, and that others have that same value.  People who do not engage in any form of service and who have no gratitude are the worse sort of people.  Do they look happy to you?  Selfless service that grows from a sense of gratitude is vital to a happy existence.  And it will make you bulletproof.

“For God loved the world so much that he gave his one and only Son, so that everyone who believes in him will not perish but have eternal life. God sent his Son into the world not to judge the world, but to save the world through him.”

– John 3:16-17

“If a man has a hundred sheep and one of them wanders away, what will he do? Won’t he leave the ninety-nine others on the hills and go out to search for the one that is lost? And if he finds it, I tell you the truth, he will rejoice over it more than over the ninety-nine that didn’t wander away! In the same way, it is not my heavenly Father’s will that even one of these little ones should perish.”

– Matthew 18:12-14

The idea here is not that we are all valuable as a collective.  The lesson is that we are all, individually, valuable – with or without the group.  If you were the only person on earth, God would have sent his Son to die, just for the sake of receiving the mere possibility that you and He might have a relationship.  He doesn’t even get a guarantee for his payment.  He is only buying the chance that He might receive what He paid for.

What would you give everything for?  What in this world has so much value to you that you would pay virtually anything, not for the actual item, but merely for the chance that you might receive it one day?

The value of that item would have to be far more than anything you have ever known.  In the eyes of God, that item is you!

Do you think the opinion of some anonymous fool on social media will really matter in comparison to the realization that you have this much value in the eyes of someone who could have anything and anyone?

God will do more for your sense of personal value, your feelings of gratitude, and your desire to be of service to others, than anything else in this world.  You will be happier, you will be more useful to the world around you, and you will be stronger.

Go get some religion!

-Sisyphus

Quite often, the only thing that separates a very negative message from a very positive message is your perception.  Perception can be altered by appropriating that negative message and changing its association.

For example, let’s look at these “Nazis Fuck Off” ribbons.  The primary issue with these ribbons is that they currently possess an outward association.  We perceive – correctly so – that the intent is to associate this statement with someone other than the wearer.  This framing gives you a mental association.  You are forced to ask yourself, “Who are they referring to?”  This, of course, causes you to wonder if they are referring to you, since there is no clear definition for the term “Nazi”.  Has the term been generalized enough to encompass you?

Instead of being angry or offended, and instead of responding to that message with your own negative message, you can take control of this narrative by appropriating the symbol and changing its association.  What if you had your ribbon that told YOU to fuck off?  For example, if you are a bunny, what would it look like if you wore an identical ribbon that said, “Bunnies Fuck Off”?  Wouldn’t this be taken as a joke?  Aren’t you intentionally telling yourself to fuck off?  This becomes self-deprecating humor.  Self-deprecating humor is the most effective and safe form of humor there is.  No one can be offended because you are the target of your own statement.  You are making fun of yourself.  This type of humor nearly always gets a laugh and it is virtually victimless.

Imagine if everyone had an identical ribbon that said, “<insert your own species> Fuck Off”.  Imagine everyone – or even a moderate number – wearing these ribbons.  All of them are self-deprecating statements.  Every time you see one, you laugh.  This would be in sharp contrast to the feeling you got from the original ribbon.  Wouldn’t this make you feel much better?  And wouldn’t it make you feel much better knowing that you are making others laugh, even if it is at your own expense?  You are using a selfless method of delivering a good feeling to other furs.

Do not let the world control how you feel.  Use the weapons that are formed against you and redefine that message into something useful and positive.  You do not have to accept any message that you are given!  You have the power to change how you see things.  Even better than that, you have the power to change how your community sees things.

What would have happened if this same tactic had been used on armbands?  What positive messages are possible with armbands?  What are some fun ways you can appropriate and redefine that message?

Deliver the message you want to be a part of.  Remember that our community is ultimately about FUN!  Make your version of every message something fun.

-Sisyphus

If you want to see every article in this series, start here.

I write these blogs because I care about you.  I care how your life turns out.  I care how you feel about yourself.  Every single article in this blog is about YOU!  Every single article in this blog has something in it that is designed to be of some benefit to you.  Who else is writing articles for you?

I hope that my track record here has earned me the right to say that what I am about to tell you is because I want you to benefit from this important truth.  You need to hear it.  You need to consider it and apply it to yourself as best you can.  Otherwise, you may never pull yourself out of the funk that you are currently living in.

80% of the negativity in your life can be completely eliminated by eliminating this one source.  Your diet.  If you are overweight, then you are eating wrong.  It is not society that is making you feel ashamed, unloved, isolated, or worthless.  It is your diet.  The food you are eating is the single most damaging element in your life right now.  Right. Now!

If you made a radical change to your diet today – Today! – you would begin to feel dramatically better within the next few weeks.

This also applies to you if you are NOT over weight, but you are eating like shit.  If you happen to be one of those people who can eat anything without gaining weight, good for you.  However, this does not mean that you are immune to the emotional effects of a poor diet.  You may not be overweight, but if your diet is trash, you are not nearly as happy as you could be.

Someone will tell you, “I can eat whatever I want and I am perfectly happy doing it!”  They are full of shit.  Even if that person is you!  But don’t take my word for it.  Observe this “happy” person.  What are they always talking about?  Did their boyfriend/girlfriend cheat on them?  Does their mother treat them like shit?  Did they just lose their job?  Are they having trouble paying their bills?  Did their car just break down?  Are they sick of politics?  Do they hate specific people for specific reasons?  Are there a lot of people who fit into those categories?  Do their feet hurt?  Are they tired of their job?  Do they feel like shit today?  Are they frustrated with their local fur meet?  Are they tired of running their own fur meet?  Can they do it better, if only they had a bigger apartment?

Are you getting my point?

Everyone knows someone like this.  EVERYONE.  So, if you cannot think of a single person who is like this, then you are that person!  You MUST consider this.  If you are always miserable and susceptible to bad things happening to you, if you are the unluckiest person you know, if your life is always broken, if you can never catch a break, if nothing you do seems to matter or work out, then you need to make the single most important change in your life that could dramatically change the way you see the world and the way the world sees you.  You need to stop eating the shit you are eating.  It is not just killing you.  It is destroying your ability to appreciate the good things in your life.  In fact, you can’t even see those good things because the only thing you can see is your next meal.

The temporary happiness that you get from food is extremely temporary.  The moment you finish that last bite of that perfect donut, you immediately begin to feel miserable about everything else.  For those few moments of happiness, you get a full day of misery.

Add to all this the physical illness that you commonly experience.  Stomach cramps, headaches, lethargy, insomnia, nausea, soreness, leg cramps, bruising, loss of balance, dizziness, and much more.  You don’t get out as much as you would like because you are always sick.  You call out of work more often than you should because you are always sick.  You are always down and an emotional drag on the room because you are always sick.

Go through your cabinet.  If it comes in a box, throw it in the trash.  If it comes prepackaged in a fancy wrapper, throw it in the trash.  If you can prepare it in “three easy steps”, throw it in the trash.  If it contains more than 10 ingredients, throw it in the trash.  If it contains numerous ingredients that you cannot pronounce without significant effort, throw it in the trash.  If it contains fructose, glucose, or a truck load of carbohydrates, throw it in the trash.  If it says, “instant”, throw it in the trash.  If it says, “now in new jumbo size”, throw it in the trash.

You feel like trash because you eat trash.  You see so much negative in the world because you eat trash.  You are always sick and tired because you eat trash.

Even if you do not aspire to lose weight, changing your diet will make you feel 1000 times better than you do.  Your attitude will improve.  Your optimism will improve.  Your self-esteem will improve – a lot.  Then, as a happy coincidence, you will also lose fat and become healthier as a result.  You will FEEL better because you ARE better.  Your body will begin to repair itself the moment you stop damaging it with garbage.  Don’t change your diet to lose weight.  Change your diet to FEEL better.  Change your diet to improve your outlook on life.  Your entire life will improve when you change your diet.

“But, how do all those external forces change, just by changing what I eat?”  The answer to that question is you.  The world doesn’t change because you eat differently.  Your perception of the world changes because you eat differently.  Most importantly, your perception of yourself changes because you eat differently.  As you begin to see yourself in a much better light, others will follow your lead.  When you begin to treat yourself better, so with the people you interact with on a daily basis.  This includes your family, your friends, your boss, your coworkers, and anyone else you come into contact with.

In this article I pointed out the circle of self respect.  I stated that as you contribute, others perceive you as having a greater value, and that ultimately rubs off on you, which leads you to perceive a greater value in yourself.  Here again, that same principle comes into play.  As you begin to feel better about yourself because you eat better, others will recognize that change in your attitude.  This will cause them to perceive you better as well.  This will result in an improvement in the way they treat you.  This will result in an improvement in the way you see yourself as you observe an improvement in the way others treat you.  Can you see how a change that you make to yourself, which is completely within your control, can have an exponential benefit down the road?  One change you make today can improve you in numerous ways in the future.  It is a snowballing effect.

80% of the things that make you miserable can be traced back to your poor diet.  Change your diet and you will almost instantly improve the quality of your life by more than 80%, because the changes that you make to yourself will have a snowballing effect as it goes out and returns to you through your peers.

Where else in life can you get such a significant return on your investment?  Do you really want your life to get better?

Stop eating like shit!

-Sisyphus

Do not apologize for who you are or what you think.  This is especially true on social media.  Do not apologize!

I could easily drum up an exception to this rule, but I know that you do not need me to do that for you.  I know that you are capable of understanding that I am not referring to the obvious exceptions when I tell you, “Never apologize”.

In today’s political climate, the social media apology was never intended to be an expression of remorse or an opportunity for forgiveness.  No one wants you to be genuine in your expression of a compassionate repentance and no one wants to forgive you.  The social media apology is a military tactic.  Nothing more!

In marketing, you will learn that your best source for new revenue is not in finding new customers.  In fact, the best source of new revenue for your business comes from those who have already purchased from you in the past.  Anyone who has purchased from you already, has now demonstrated that they are willing to purchase from you again.  You might think it would be unreasonable to expect someone to purchase from you again and again, but this is the exact opposite to the truth.  Your previous customers are going to be your best bet for future business.  Their willingness to purchase once is a demonstration of their willingness to purchase again.  This is a well-known marketing principle and the biggest and most successful businesses in the world take advantage of this principle.

This very same principle holds true for the social media apologist.  Once you apologize, you have demonstrated your willingness to apologize again and again.  The culture of hate will punish you for your willingness to apologize again and again and again.

When you apologize on social media in response to an “outrage”, you are inviting more attacks.  The purpose of attacking you – you are not being “approached”, but you are being attacked – is to determine if you are open to more attacks.  Once you demonstrate this weakness, you will be attacked more often and by more people.  The apology has signaled your willingness to concede again and again until you no longer have any control over the narrative.  You are officially their slave.  You must now apologize and concede to every point they make, or you will be attacked again.  The purpose of the social media apology is to force you to align with their ideology or self-censor yourself.  If you do not conform or comply, you will be attacked.  The apology means you are open to be attacked and ultimately silenced.  Control is the end game – not forgiveness.

For your own sake, do not apologize to the nameless, faceless, soulless mobs on social media.  It will never buy you a single ounce forgiveness.  It was never intended to offer you forgiveness.  The intent for demanding apologies on social media is to test your armor for weak points.  Once you apologize, you are done for.  You have already lost.

The best and only way to reverse this destructive course is to express your opinions as you see fit and to stop apologizing.  At first, you will have a great deal of resistance to your new resolution.  This will fade as you continue to demonstrate your unwillingness to capitulate.  Stay strong.

“I would rather stand for what I believe and be hated, than bow down and be loved.” – Dave Rubin

-Sisyphus

This article is part of a series.  This article will make sense on its own, but if you want the whole story, you should go back and read this series from the beginning.

Do you ever remember hearing an adult say to you, “You’ll understand when you’re older”?  Well, I hate saying this to you, but, “You’ll understand when you’re older”.

What feels like a catastrophic world-ending issue to you today will not mean anything later.  That is one of the reasons why you should try to be of a cooler mind when dealing with the issues of today.  In a few years, you may realize just how foolish you looked by making a big deal over something that was not a big deal.

This is not to say that every issue you encounter is unimportant.  It may not even mean that the issues you see as important are not important.  The change in viewpoint and mentality that occurs as you get older comes by experience.  You become stronger.  You become more stable.  You are capable of dealing with adversity far better and with more control.  Even legitimately bad things are not nearly as overwhelming when you have experience.

What good is this knowledge to you right now?  The good news is that you do not have to wait for experience.  You can generate that experience right now!  By intentionally placing yourself in challenging positions, you can build your personal experience and emotional strength.

To strengthen your resolve and your ability to handle emotional stress, go find something challenging to do with your free time.  Ride that roller coaster that you have always been too afraid to ride.  Try out for a dance competition.  Go to a job interview, even if you are not looking for a job.  Intentionally put yourself in a position to be judged.  Place yourself in a position where you must make the grade or fail.  Instead of avoiding uncomfortable situations where you might fail and/or look foolish, go and look for those “opportunities” and throw yourself into the deep end.  Make it your personal hobby to “do or die”.

This type of stress will not hurt you.  On the contrary, it will toughen you up.  This is how you improve “mental toughness”.  Every situation you endure will build a little callous on your emotional willpower.  You will become more and more capable of dealing with everyday dramatic events.  One day, without even realizing it, you will experience some dramatic event that once left you feeling isolated and depressed for days and find that it has little or no effect on you.  You will realize just how much you have built your endurance.  Instead of being a victim, you are the victor.  Your calm demeanor and your coolness under pressure will impress everyone around you.

Don’t you want to be that person?  Don’t you want to FEEL like that person?  Don’t you want to be invincible?  Go find an experience that frightens you or makes you feel self-conscious.  Take on that experience!  Then, after it is over, even if you fail miserably, take note of the fact that you did not die from it.  Every time you do this, you will become a little stronger.

Go find something scary to do!

-Sisyphus